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Here are my top 10 myths on being single in Boston: 1. But, when I ask them how they’re meeting these men they inevitably ALWAYS say “online”. Fact: Online dating apps are one way to date in Boston. You have to be proactive dating if you want to meet a great person and get into a relationship. Myth: Professional, educated, attractive women are hard to find in Boston. Fear of being rejected, being disappointed, or being let down (again).

But in speaking to local singles every day, I hear the same “myths” over and over again about how they’re unsuccessful in finding love. They’re smart, successful and they’re not going to settle. Myth: Every guy over 50 wants a girl half his age Fact: I do hear this from single women a lot. I will say that exceptional people are exceptionally hard to find, but that’s one of the reasons my clients work with me. Myth: Online dating apps are a great way to date in Boston. What’s really keeping you from moving forward is fear.

Recently I hear from singles that there’s more messaging and less dating than ever before online. Myth: There will be a right time to date, it’s just not now. They don’t waste their time chatting it up with guys at a bar. And I’m probably working for them as their matchmaker! Granted, if you haven’t been in the dating scene for over a decade, the task can seem a bit daunting. And with a little date coaching, you can get on the right track and have a great time. We’ve seem more relationships come from that than you know. They work with a professional matchmaker because they only want to date the best.

Aimee Burke is a Boston dating coach and matchmaker at Lunch Dates.

I learned of the phenomenon of “good enough” marriage, a term social anthropologists use to describe marriages that were less about finding the perfect match than a suitable candidate whom the family approved of for the couple to embark on adulthood And along with the sociologist Eric Klinenberg, co-author of my new book, I conducted focus groups with hundreds of people across the country and around the world, grilling participants on the most intimate details of how they look for love and why they’ve had trouble finding it.

I am perpetually indecisive about even the most mundane things, and I couldn’t imagine navigating such a huge life decision so quickly. Happily so—and probably more so than most people I know who had nonarranged marriages.Throw in the fact that people now get married later in life than ever before, turning their early 20s into a relentless hunt for more romantic options than previous generations could have ever imagined, and you have a recipe for romance gone haywire.In the course of our research, I also discovered something surprising: the winding road from the classified section of yore to Tinder has taken an unexpected turn.10 in., has brown hair, lives in Brooklyn, is a member of the Baha’i faith and loves the music of Naughty by Nature.Before online dating, this would have been a fruitless quest, but now, at any time of the day, no matter where you are, you are just a few screens away from sending a message to your very specific dream man. Throughout all our interviews—and in research on the subject—this is a consistent finding: in online dating, women get a ton more attention than men.

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Even a guy at the highest end of attractiveness barely receives the number of messages almost all women get.

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